6 Red Flags That They'll Eventually Make You Miserable
Jonathan Borba

6 Red Flags That They’ll Eventually Make You Miserable

Red flags aren’t always outside behaviors that the other person does. Sometimes, they’re internal feelings that you have within yourself. Here are some red flags that you’re better off without them:

You feel drained after every interaction with them. Your person is supposed to be more than someone you make out with on the couch. They’re supposed to be your friend and confidant. If you feel exhausted after hanging around them or actively dread going to see them again, then that’s a sign you shouldn’t be together. Your partner is supposed to get you excited. You’re supposed to cherish each moment they’re by your side. If you’re counting down the moments until your date ends, then it can’t be that great of a date.

You feel like you’re constantly putting on a show to keep them interested. Early on in the relationship, you’ll be on your best behavior. But you shouldn’t feel pressured to lie to them or pretend you’re someone you’re not in order to impress them. If they aren’t happy with the real you, then a relationship is never going to last. You need someone who is interested in you, not the version of yourself you’re pretending to be lately. You can’t keep up this charade forever, so you might as well find someone who accepts you from the start.

You’re worried about including them in family/friend gatherings. It’s normally to be nervous when people you care about are meeting each other for the first time, but if you’re terrified that your partner is going to say and do the wrong thing, then you clearly don’t trust them. And you need someone who you can count on to come through for you. If your partner isn’t able to get through a dinner with your friends without insulting them, then why would you want to be with them?

You feel like they’re a thousand miles away when you’re speaking to them. You deserve someone who is present. Someone who listens when you speak and values your opinion. If you’re sharing the same room and feel like they couldn’t be farther away, there’s a problem. Your dates shouldn’t be spent separately scrolling through phones. When they’re present physically, they should also feel present emotionally. Otherwise, your quality time isn’t really time spent together at all.

You feel like you’re missing out on opportunities because you’re with them. Your partner should encourage you to chase after your wildest dreams. They should support your big goals. They shouldn’t be holding you back or convincing you to remain in one place. If your person is stopping you from pursuing something important to you, then you don’t belong together. It doesn’t mean they’re a bad person. But it does mean they’re bad for you.

You have more complaints about them than compliments. When you’re talking to your friends about this person, you should be bragging. You shouldn’t be whining about how you wish they treated you better. If you have more complaints than compliments, then you should take a long hard look at the relationship. It might be time to end it – or at least to have a serious talk about your expectations moving forward.