Andrew Neel

19 Guys Share Things They Wish Women Knew About Men’s Feelings

Sometimes feelings can seem elusive when it comes to the men in our lives. Us women often have our feelings right there on our sleeves, so it makes it seem like men don’t have them at all. Newsflash: They totally do. Men recently shared what they wish women knew about men’s feelings, and some of this is truly eye-opening.

That they have them.

That feelings have no gender and are not exclusive to women.

u/CaptainPrestedge

That feelings aren’t a weakness.

That they aren’t a sign of weakness.

u/gameld

They’re allowed to have feelings and emotions.

We’re allowed to have them. I’m a 250lb man in a job that on paper people think is heroic. It takes a toll and when I get emotional about what I have to see or do people dismiss it and pretend like I’m weak.

u/bothonpele

They like hearing they’re loved.

That we like hearing β€œi love you” out of nowhere too.

u/neosurimi

They don’t have an outlet for their feelings.

That men are often not ever given a place to express their feelings safely.

This is why I recommend therapy to all my bros. It was the best decision of my whole life.

u/YoYoMoMa

What they look like on the outside might not match how they feel on the inside.

That we might not say it all out loud even if we’re totally broken emotionally. If we seem distant it’s probably because we have tens of years of trauma and mistakes playing on a loop in our heads. And the reason we don’t talk about it is because, at least for me I find it difficult to talk about my issues if I haven’t fully reached some sort of conclusion to those issues in my own head. It’s easier to just sit there quietly and wait for time to pass.

If we don’t seem enthusiastically happy and hyped up about every minute of the day it doesn’t mean we’d had lost interest in you, we’re just tired to a point where our brain literally stops functioning. We still are enthusiastically happy and hyped up just about spending that time with you, even if we’d physically look like we’re bored to death. If we’re there for the cuddles we love you, and boy do we love those cuddles more than we like to admit.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is that our appearance to you might look different than what we actually think and feel. I could be having the best time of my life and I’ll look like I wanna end it all and I hate it here just because brain decided to β€œrandom bullshit go” all the trauma on us just like that out of nowhere.

u/shoesvw3

They mean what they say.

When I say β€œhey this bothers me, please don’t do it” I mean β€œhey this bothers me, please don’t do it.”

Don’t act all fucking surprised when I get bothered when you do the thing I politely asked you not to do.

u/Sepapa

All guys are different.

Not all guys are the same. Not all guys just think about sex especially when actively seeking a relationship. Oh and we have emotions.

u/TotalGamer12

They want to know you care.

That just asking us how we are and meaning it could brighten their day and they’ll treasure it forever

That just listening is more then anyone else has done for them

u/DaGamingTurtleB

That silence is terrible sign.

The moment we go silent we are much more angry than the moment we shout

u/Confident-Abrocoma79

And their silence is meaningful.

Sometimes silence is a sign of irredeemable disappointment

u/Stunning-Spirit5275

Just because they aren’t expressing them, doesn’t mean they don’t have emotions.

If someone goes silent or completely unemotional during an argument don’t needle them with why aren’t you showing emotion and why don’t you fight for this relationship.

Maybe it’s because I know that my current emotions aren’t healthy to express verbally at the moment and I’m trying to very carefully not to yell something while angry that I don’t mean.

Not expressing emotions isn’t the same as not having them.

u/joeydee93

That they’re emotions shouldn’t be discounted.

That it really frustrates us when every negative feeling we have is chalked down to β€œhe’s insecure” or β€œfragile male ego” or β€œtoxic masculinity” when women have all the same negative feelings we do. πŸ˜‚

u/HeelSteamboat

That they don’t want to seem like a burden.

Many guys feel like being open causes a burden onto others and just try to put on a smile and keep it to themselves.

u/_W9NDER_

It’s hard for them to open up.

Its really hard to finally lay down our guard, expose our vulnerabilities and feel something genuine. Please don’t abuse it.

u/uberst0ic

Their feelings deserve equal consideration.

That if she cant care for them on the same level that shes asking us to care for hers… she better leave.

u/InterestingEgg3721

They might not be in touch with their feelings.

Men are pretty straightforward when they talk about what they feel or think yet are very out of touch with them.

u/SmolAnus

They’ve been taught to suppress.

Men’s feelings are like an iceberg. What your seeing is only about 1/3rd of what’s going on inside. We’ve been trained since childhood to suppress the rest of them.

u/Decent-Box5009

They get caught up in the façade.

The majority of us aren’t really sex driven monsters, its just a faΓ§ade around our friends. We just wanna be loved.

u/OK_Frosting_9178